Nothing Wrong With Nice

By Tommy Leung on 07/07/2010 in Life, Marketing

One of my favorite books is The Power of Nice. In fact, it’s fundamental to how I am–another fundamental book is Whatever You Think Think The Opposite. There is a stigma associated with being nice. As if being nice is bad for you. A commonly known saying is that nice guys finish last. I beg to differ.

And this isn’t just a matter for guys. There’s a popular book titled Nice Girls Don’t Get The Corner Office. I haven’t read the book but, the title pushes the idea that being nice is a negative.

I think the problem lies in how we define “nice”. That word has been used to describe me countless times at countless ages. I’ve heard it a bit often recently. And it’s probably true, I am nice.

But then, there’s those who are “nice”.

There are people who are “nice” because they want something from you. I never want anything from you. Whatever I do, I do it because I want to do it. No strings.

There are people who are “nice” because they have no opinions of their own. They’ll do whatever you say. They aren’t nice, they are weak. I’m thoroughly opinionated and possibly hardheaded. I’ll listen and try to understand where you are coming from but, I will not change my mind simply because you don’t like my point of view. Tough luck.

There are people who are “nice” because they want to known as being nice. They are about as fake as it gets. They are nice and cheery on the outside and plotting your demise on the inside. They’ll resent doing that favor for you but, show you nothing but smiles while doing it.

Who would like to deal with any one of these “nice” people in business or in personal relationships? Let’s be honest, no one likes a con-man, a push-over, or a fake. Whether they want to disguise themselves behind a veil of “nice” is irrelevant. They aren’t what they seem.

There are the truly nice. The truly good. Those who do good things because it’s a good thing to do. Those who believe in themselves and are perfectly okay with others disagreeing. Those who will tell you like it is because that’s what it is. They won’t con you, bore you, or lie to you.

And they do get ahead. In every aspect and with a clear conscience.

When Ideas Have Sex

By Tommy Leung on 06/30/2010 in Life, Marketing

The fastest way to come up with new ideas is to let ideas have sex. Whether the conceived ideas are good or bad is of little importance. Bad ideas will die a premature death. Only the good ideas will survive.

No great ideas came about by themselves. Individuals are credited with being the first to invent or discover something but, that ignores all the work that had gone before to make it possible for this one individual to get there.

It is impossible for the first man to invent a pencil on his own no matter how smart he was. Firstly, he wouldn’t have any time left to invent after he’s done hunting and gathering. The sole effort of getting enough to eat takes up most of the daylight hours. The rest of the time is used to ensure that wild animals don’t kill him at night.

The only way for him to get time to do things other than find food and have a safe shelter is to cooperate with another person. One person finds food and the other builds a shelter. At the end of the day, both have food and shelter in half the time it would have otherwise took them to do it alone.

This is no new revelation. Economists call this comparative advantage. You trade one thing for another. In this case, these two primitive humans are trading food for shelter and vice versa. Both are better off.

In fact, there is no other way for humans to prosper.  There is nothing as uniquely human as trade. Trade is why we are the most dominate life form on the planet. It is why other species of upright apes are no longer with us. They didn’t trade. We did.

No other creature on the planet trades like we do. You never see a dog offer another dog a bone for a rope. It is an idea that is inconceivable to them.

Modern society is built on top of the idea of trade. Everything from our computers to our food is made possible by trade–the trade of goods, services, and ideas.

This blog software that I use came about by the contributions and ideas of thousands of people. Most of whom I will never know. The design, the technology, and the architecture has been built over time little by little. Idea by idea.

They are then glued together by a much smaller group of people to create a tool that has enabled millions of people to write about the mundane to the world changing.

This happened because a lot of ideas had a lot of sex.

True to Me

By Tommy Leung on 06/10/2010 in Life

I visited my parents a couple of weeks ago. My Dad told me that we were going to have a family dinner for my grandfather in a couple of weeks. It’s his birthday soon. Sure, we do this every year. Most of my Aunts, Uncles, and cousins show up and we hang out. It’s a good time.

But, this time, for some reason, my Dad decided to tell me that I should give my grandfather a gift. Actually, just money. My Dad said it would look good.

Oh? Look good to who?

I didn’t like the idea. It wasn’t about the money. It was the principle. I’m not close to my grandfather. In fact, none of the younger generation are. His reputation is that of the grumpy old man.

He doesn’t talk, he just grumbles and frowns. He yells at the younger kids trying to talk to their mothers when there’s a game of Mahjong going on. Apparently, he considers these kids a disturbance slowing down his game. He’s a real charmer.

He’s old. He gets a pass. No one calls him on it.

He can’t connect with the young. We don’t speak the same language. And the language that we both understand–body language–is always negative. In no society is that a way to build a relationship. But that is the reality.

I give gifts because I care about the person I’m gifting. Whether its a gift for no reason or a gift because of an occasion. I do it because I care. I put energy into it. Giving gifts because you have to is not a gift. It’s actually a lie. It’s telling someone you care when you don’t.

I don’t like to lie.

My Dad either didn’t understand where I was coming from or just didn’t care. He didn’t seem particularly happy afterwards.

But, I will not diminish the value of every gift I’ve ever given so that I can put on a show. By no means will I knowingly compromise my principles to project a specific appearance. A compromise here, a compromise there, and before I know it I’ll be ready to become a politician.

Those who want to judge me are free to. I don’t care. I’m super because of what I do. Not because of what others aren’t doing. I don’t measure myself based on how others are failing. If anything, I want to be awesome when everyone else is awesome. It’s not a victory to kick someone when they’re down.

I have always felt strongly about principles. I don’t pick up money off the floor. I’m not talking about coins. I have come across lost bills on more than one occasion. There was one time where I remember seeing about $60 on the floor. I didn’t pick it up.

Why?

Well, it’s not mine. If I picked it up, the person who did lose it will never be able to come back and find it. Yes, it’s a non-practical way to think. Someone else will walk by and pick it up and the original person who lost it won’t get it anyway. I understand that. But, it also means that I didn’t steal it. At the end of the day, that’s just more important to me than a guilty splurge I can have with $60.

Almost $1000 was accidentally deposited into my bank account recently. I viewed the deposit slip online. The bank teller confused a number and put the money in my account. I saw it at night. I went to the bank the next day to get it corrected. I’m not an angel.

This error would have been corrected regardless of whether I did anything. I understand that. But, I went to the bank at my earliest convenience because whoever deposited that money might have needed it. It also wasn’t mine. The only right thing to do was to get it corrected as soon as possible.

My Mom has this story of me when I was little. I used to go to preschool in Manhattan and she would pick me up after work. She would also have food for me. We would take the train home to Brooklyn. I would only eat it if I was seated. I really don’t know why I wouldn’t if I was standing. From what I can gather from my Mom, it was because I wanted to do it the right way.

That sounds like me. I like to do things for the right reasons.

This is how I’ve been for as long as I’ve been. It’s true to me. And I like it.

Invest in You

By Tommy Leung on 05/23/2010 in Life

The economic future I see is very gloomy. Hopefully, I’m wrong. I’m not the only one who doesn’t see an economic recovery. There’s an entire community of economists who don’t. You won’t hear many of them on TV. I guess their position isn’t very popular.

There is one that you might have heard of: Peter Schiff. He predicted the economic crisis we are in when everyone else laughed at him.

The economics really doesn’t add up to a recovery. But, economics isn’t really a science. Not a science like physics at least. Physics can predict the future if given all the variables. It can tell you exactly when a ball will reach the ground when dropped at a certain height in a certain condition.

Economics can’t do that. Economics can’t time it that accurately. Even if one can predict that the economy will go to hell in a hand basket and be correct, it doesn’t mean there won’t be some very prosperous stops along the way.

In the end, none of us really know. Economists aren’t psychics.

We do know we aren’t in a boom. That’s apparent. The economy is in the toilet. That isn’t a prediction. That is the reality. Right now. Whether the economy will recover next year, five years from now, or ten no one can be sure. It can even get incrementally worse for ten years. No one knows.

The only thing that is sure to be a good investment in bad times and good times is you. Whether unemployment sky rockets or falls through the floor, improving yourself is going to be pay off.

It is easy to forgo self improvement in good times. It’ll take a lot of people to frog leap you for it to really matter. And besides, the other guy is probably thinking the same thing. So we all stay in relatively the same place while the good times keep rolling.

It is in the bad times that we suddenly realize that we have to do something to be better than the other guy. The competition is fiercer. The jobs are fewer. The other guy is thinking the same thing. And so it becomes a matter of who can work harder and smarter. The one who continuously improved through good times is sitting in the best position. He’s way ahead of the pack.

If you haven’t been constantly learning as much as you can, it isn’t too late to start now. It’s never too late. There’s always those who are still praying that the good times return instead of doing something about it. Leap frog those guys first.

I’d recommend looking into personal branding. The economy will eventually improve. When it does, the social trends forming right now are going to still be here. Don’t let the rug get pulled from under your feet. The world of Google, Facebook, Twitter, blogs, social media, and the rest of Web 2.0 isn’t only here to stay, it’s here to dominate the way we live, work, and play for the foreseeable future.

So start or continue to invest in you. It’s the safest investment you can make.

Five Easy Minutes

By Tommy Leung on 04/24/2010 in Life

We are surrounded by products that offer us a quick and easy solution. We see most of them with fitness products–4 weeks to six pack abs! Isn’t it odd how many of these programs there are? Certainly, if any of these products worked as advertised, why would we need another?

The secret is this: they don’t work.

Often, there is no quick and easy way to where you want to go. There are only snake oil salesman telling you they’ve found the shortcut. The long forgotten secret. The magical incantation.

If there was a quick and easy way, no one would have to sell it to you over and over. It would be widely used. That’s what happens to good ideas: they spread.

There are best ways to do things. There are optimal ways to six pack abs. It just isn’t going to take 4 weeks. It’s quicker than doing it wrong. But, it’ll be work–hard work. It’s definitely not magic.

So buckle down and do the work; it’ll get you there. It won’t be quick and it won’t be easy but, you’ll get there.

Greatness doesn’t come in 4 weeks, just 15 minutes a day, or in five easy minutes.